Life in the Blog Pause

I have been home just under 3 hours and am enjoying catching up on the blog world that I’ve missed out on for most of the week. After spending nine hours in a vehicle today, it’s good to cozy up with Laptop and catch up on other people’s lives. Currently, I am doing laundry to repack and venture north for the week to visit my dear friend Jill Pole tomorrow morning. I am almost too excited to sleep! I think it’s been a year ago this next week since we’ve been in each other’s presence.

As to my week, my time in New Mexico had both its good and sad moments. The good of the week came from hearing some things from one of our speakers that is enabling me to better think through what’s next on my plate…and to figure out maybe how the Lord is preparing me for the new ministry He has for me. Since I have shared with some of the students that I directly invest in, I feel that I am finally free to express to the blog world that at this moment in my life, I will be packing up and moving to Florida for the next year.

Which brings me back to the sad of the week…while I am excited about the possibilities of this new adventure (and there really are some exciting things that I will most definitely be sharing soon), this week found me fighting the hurts and pain surrounding this decision. I found myself fighting my flesh so much this week as I encountered a barrage of unfeeling questions from the insiders who have known about this decision since January. The fight with the flesh came as I struggled to not give into my perceptions of what I believe others are thinking about me. It was a wearying fight. I don’t feel that I walked out of the week in a way that makes me feel proud. During one of our final worship times as I wrestled with all of these thoughts and feelings, the Lord nudged a thought past me: Blythe, are you worshipping your pain and hurt? Don’t you know that I see you? Worship Me and what I say is true about you…

Later that same day as I spent some time in the Word, He seemed to reaffirm the thoughts during the worship time as I read about the Israelites in Joshua 7. In going up against Jericho, the Israelites were instructed to stay away from the articles of destruction and to spare Rahab and her family. Achan, however, had taken some of the spoil for himself, burying it in the ground outside his tent and it resulted in his life. (Funny to me that in taking what he desired and was forbidden that he couldn’t even enjoy it! What’s the used in having something that you have to bury?)

Go and consecrate the people. Tell them to consecrate themselves tomorrow, for this is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says, ‘There are among you, Israel, things set apart. You will not be able to stand against your enemies until you remove what is set apart.’ (Joshua 7:13)

As I read this, I was aware that the recent hurt and pain in my life was something that has an amazing ability to destroy me…and has an incredible capacity to keep me from standing against my "enemies." In realizing this, the Lord lovingly brought to mind those things that I need to remove…and that I need to walk gracefully in forgiveness toward those who have inflicted such hurt. And I just have to say, that identifying and relinquishing these deep hurts lifted the heavy weight that has encased my heart for several months. So thankful that He is a Jesus of rest...

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (Matt. 11:28-30)